I swear to gosh* that priest bought feminine pads, ya hear me!!??

 *edited for sensitive viewers

For some reason I can't think of the opening sentence to this post. Shoot.* I had it last night before going to bed, but now "in the heat of the moment" keeps popping in my head.  I'm trying to say something along the lines of, "because it's a holiday therefore I write about the season." 

There. That's the best opening line:

Because it's a holiday therefore I write about the season. 

So I'm sure you're all sitting on the edge of your seat waiting for me to regal you with the incredible Easter festivities that took place in Argentina (No? I implore you to reconsider!). Well, let me just say this: sit back in your seat: the ride's about to start (can I use two colon's in a sentence?  Professor Brown says: "no").

 The day began pleasantly enough, see for yourself:

First, we went to the local Parrilla (BBQ) for always delicious...BBQ.  After, we went on a lovely bike ride. Actually, Ivan and his younger brother, Alejo, went for a block-ride. It involved riding around the block.  As you can see, Argentina's technology is so advanced, they've developed a contraption in which two people can ride a bike at the same time--cutting travel time not in half.  Impressive!

Ivan (left) y Alejo (centro) y El Dad (far right).

This is what the block consists of:

Infamous location of taxi driver rendezvous *cringe*

Incredible view from the corner. Incredible place to ride a bike.

 After all that fun and delicious food, we decided to go home.  My favorite part of the return trip: the elevator ride. This thing scares the shit out of me (thankfully!) because it looks like it was built in the 1800's (more proof of Argentina's advanced technology) and sounds like the cords are going to snap each time you (or me or Ali or Ivan or Soqueta) step into it.  But we still like to have fun.

No look at me. Yes look at camera.

 Next Top Models of the Americas.

I'm really getting the hang of this picture taking business. You've heard of the incredibly photogenic guy, right? We're the next best thing. Kind of.

Later that evening, I set out to the store on a mission to buy bananas and cheese. My mission was sidetracked when I came across a most delightful surprise:

Can you guess why I'm showing off my double chins??  Priest spotting!

I've never seen one so up close!  I'll admit, I've seen one or two or three in the movies, and a few when I was a kid for the obligatory annual church visit (oh, and the time I was baptized, went through catechism, communion and confirmation), but this is different. This is just like when celebrities are spotted doing normal things.

I decided to follow Padre Juan because it seemed like a good idea at the time. What I discovered was very disturbing...

A) I caught our Father eyeing the junk food items. What's this whole thing about the body being a sacred temple made up of the "body, the blood, and the holy ghost"??  It doesn't look like he's adhering to the holy doctrine. It also may look like I need to go through catechism again.

Hiding behind a shelf using my ninja stealth moves. I go undetected.

I missed my calling: paparazzi.

B) While carefully following Father Jorge, I made sure not to throw off his groove. It's a good thing I didn't, because I never would have discovered him grabbing something from this shelf:

Doesn't look so bad from this distance. Just wait...

And for the close up!

Infidelity: Ladysoft Night Feminine Night Pads for the sleepy times.

 Perhaps he grabbed them for a lady friend? A daughter? He still lives with his mother? He has an overactive bladder?

Second guess his motives...

My finger. Our Father.

Father Guantanimo may also be suffering from some digestion issues as I noted he was very interested in the dairy section, specifically Actimel (helps strengthen your body's natural defences).

Argentina's not the best for your gastrointestinal health.

However, on closer examination...

What price will you pay for frequent bowel movements? Eternal damnation.

Looks like Pedro Jesus is checking out for the day. But let it be known, we have all witnessed the injustice that's been paid today.  Easter Sunday and no whiskey? For Shame.

Not drowning his sorrows.